everything has change

     one month of leave. am i really resting? do everyone feel that i am really enjoying my time? alright, i don't deny i really have time, even if not enough, one month is quite long. but i feel that i have a lot of things i wanted or expected to achieve but yet, failed to achieve last month. due to weather, due to tiredness, due to lack of discipline, due to school. many factors to explain, but anyway, who cares?

back at work

     now that i am back at work, i feel that the working environment had change within this month. or is it that i felt that i changed over the month. i no longer as relax, happy or carefree apart from chatting with team b & thinyu. i felt that i officially out of team a. i am not in their group anymore. maybe its due to cailei. seems that we are not as close as last time. but mark & james are still warm and chat with me. maybe i become more quiet. but after msn-ing with mark. i guess its not only i change. the environment, indeed, had changed.

     this is the catalyst that make mark resigning so early, much earlier than expected. he also no longer feel happy working here. maybe due to stress, due to people. i used to stay on because of the people in our level. but now, i stayed for the promise i made to boyes since he really uphold his promises and give me what he promised me. he also quite good to me. i enjoy working under him, less stress even if i have to attend morning meeting now, because i know, he will be there to back me up.

studies make thing worse

     maybe now that i have to juggle both work & studies, i have lesser personal time. weekdays, 3 days of school, 2 days of OT to cover up early exit. weekend, on the other hand, will be used for projects etc. even after work/study, i stayed awake till 1am to do my assignment. not that my assignment is that tough, but still need time to understand, revise & do. only today, i give myself time off to go online not doing work, after lessons.

     suddenly feel tired. just tired. i don't feel stress at work this week due to the fact that angie on leave. but yet i am not as joyful, just relieved. i need time to adjust to the life i am in now, i guess. hope tomorrow will be a better day.